Just a little bit of trivia about me…
I don’t like to argue. I don’t like bad feelings. I hate it when I say something that hurts others. I hate that I am grumpy in the mornings, mostly I just don’t really like mornings. Give me an hour of quiet time and a couple cups of coffee…if “morning” could start an hour after I wake, all would be well within my world.
But I digress,
When I wrote Oh Lord, My Church Is Full Of Sinners… I was waiting for the backlash, the disagreement, the harsh words. Even before I wrote it. In fact, I put the article off for months because I did not want the confrontation.
Imagine my surprise when I did not receive any negative comments. None. Not a one. Not only did I not receive any negative feedback, there was absolutely no feedback at all. This is a dilemma. As a writer, a person, and as a Christian.
I know that the article was read, my statistics tell me how many times it was read, how it was accessed, and how much time readers invested in the article.
I geared myself up to defend my beliefs and I did not end up having to do so.
Then life got busy. I began a new job, ending up working 60+ hours a week with just one day off to recuperate before it begins again. My brain has not really been working…it takes Sunday off too. I haven’t visited my own blog in weeks, so Friday when I logged on I was surprised to see someone had left me a comment.
I assumed that the comment was placed on my recent post on the death of our Sweet Baby Rosie, my thoughts have been consumed by her in the last week.
Ah…it has been just a week.
And I miss her just as much today as I did last Sunday.
Ah…it has only been a week.
We all get busy in life. We are wrapped up in what is going on in our present. Our family, marriage, children, jobs. Life gets in the way sometimes. For all of us.
But, as I live each day I learn a bit more. About myself, my faith, beliefs and how I want my children to perceive the world. They are growing into adulthood, forming their own beliefs on the way. I see how much influence Bruce and I have over their thoughts and I want to make sure that I am doing them no harm. How I act, how I treat others, is a model for them. And I hope to set the bar high, so they reach and think as they grow. That they think not only with their head but with their hearts.
The greatest gifts
God, in my opinion, gave us many incredible gifts-too many to name.
One of these gifts was love. The ability to give it and the ability to feel it.
I think that the reason that we miss our Sweet Baby Rosie so much is that she was LOVE. Pure love. She radiated joy. Always. Constantly. And no one was left out. She included everyone that she came in contact with. Each and every day she gave so much.
When we had hard times, she comforted us. When we danced, she danced with us. She never held a grudge, she never pouted. Not once did she ever make us feel that we were not doing enough for her. That we weren’t enough for her. To her, we were her whole world.
Now that she is gone, we realize how much we were loved. And we miss it. It is a HUGE hole.
We are all in mourning. The loss of this pure soul is devastating. My daughter and I were talking about it, the loss. And we agreed, that if we could take away the pain by forgetting Rosie-we would not do it. Although we are floundering and devastated, we choose to be unhappy, we choose love.
Humans are not the only species that bond, that love. When we were having financial issues due to my illness we were worried about losing our home. We love our house and have worked to make it a family hub. But our biggest concern was that if we lost our home it was unlikely that we would be able to take Rosie with us into a rental.
In fact, we had many conversations about it. We could take her to live with my parents, they loved her. She was a “grand-pup” to them. Just saying the words, “Nanna and Papa”, incited her to dance. She loved them as much as they loved her. We even discussed it with my parents, hoping they would come to a different conclusion than we had. But they agreed, although she loved them we were her family. We were her “Joy”. Even if we visited every weekend, we all knew that it would not be long before she died of a broken heart.
Is discernment. Wisdom. Intellect. Reason. God gave us a brain. Each and every species that inhabit this world.
But He gave humans the ability to think. To make decisions, form opinions, beliefs. He gave us the ability to choose to follow Him, but He also gave us the ability to decide not to follow.
He gave us the ability to read His words and the brain to figure out what those words meant to us.
Humans are not the only species to love. Turtle Doves, Bald Eagles, Swans, Gibbons all mate for life. In fact, these animals are much better at lifelong relationships than humans.
They don’t choose to divorce. They do not feel jealousy or hatred. They don’t have stressful jobs or dreams they will do anything to attain. These characteristics are human, they come with our brain, our ability to think, to choose.
I live in Indiana
For three days this past week thousands of couples were joined together in wedded bliss in Indiana. Love abounded. Pure love. Love with no boundaries. Anyone who loved could be married. ANYONE.
From Wednesday morning until Friday evening. It was a “Rosie” kind of feeling for 3 whole days, pure love and joy, in the state of Indiana. Although I am grieving Rosie, my heart was filled with pure joy, knowing that others were being able to validate love. Share love, spread love and witness love.
God gave us many tremendous gifts
Two of them are love and discernment. I believe that these are gifts that He gave to us and He intended for us to use them. Each and every one of us. I know that I did not go into “why” I believe what I believe, and that is the crux of the matter to many. I have researched, and read, and prayed. I have loved and lost and seen love and loss in others.
God’s greatest commandments directed us to love…
- Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with thy whole heart, and with thy whole soul, and with thy whole mind, and with thy whole strength;
- Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself
Life is too short here on Earth. Too short to restrict love. To deny love. To judge love.
I am leaving you with a video that I believe. I am grabbing onto the love that was gifted to us, I am using my mind to discern what I believe. How I believe. Who I believe.
And I am wishing that each and everyone of you know PURE LOVE.
For whomever you have love and feel love grab onto it, with both hands. It is a gift that has been given to you, accept it, revel in it, roll in it. When you see it recognize it. Cherish it. Know it.
I truly believe this video and all it states. Use your heart and your mind. Love your neighbor and pass it on!
P.S. Just because I was shocked at the lack of confrontational comments does not mean that this post is inviting them, if you have something that you want to say…I request that you say it with kindness. Say it with thought. Say it with discernment. I would love to hear your thoughts but only if they are stated with respect. xooxoxoox